Still Trying…

So I failed at another day one. Almost made it and thought I was going to but the husband wanted to go out for dinner and try somewhere new. Well, it was Italian and wine was everywhere, well it seemed. Every table had wine on it, at least the ones I was looking at. Can I be one of those people without wine? Can I manage to have water, tea or soda and not wine while everyone else partakes? I think I can do that. I re-played the evening this morning and the first glass just wasn’t enough, the second got me to where I felt like that should be where I should stop, but I didn’t and two bottles later I don’t remember the rest of the night. How nice it would have been to have dinner then stop for some indulgent dessert, come home to my dogs and sit with the husband and watch a really good movie that I would remember in the morning? I feel like I’m longing to be in that place where I don’t drink and yet it still consumes my thoughts. Tonight, there will be no wine. They don’t sell it here on Sundays (unless we go out to dinner, which we won’t). I know I can go out and get a bottle “to go” and would of course get two just to be safe, but I’m not doing that tonight. I am going to do nothing, shop the internet for things to put on my wish list and go to bed really early…..sober!

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