And again and hopefully the final straw.

Starting again tomorrow. I have a profound knowledge that I can’t drink. I can’t enjoy wine, I don’t enjoy wine, and it is destroying my soul. Problem is, I have to be strong on my own. My husband has only hatred and criticism for me and I can’t really blame him, I suppose. I will get this with or without his help and without it will most likely be the case, but that is okay. I am strong. I have gotten through a lot on my own and I am extremely resilient. I haven’t had another choice which I guess has made me strong and gives me hope I can thrive in sobriety.

I am at the point where alcohol doesn’t do any good, doesn’t provide relief and doesn’t bring happiness. It’s all negative, which is good for once.

So, tomorrow. Day 1.

Done and starting to live my life.

This is for me. For once.

Christy

16 Comments Add yours

  1. habitdone says:

    There are many of us out here to support you! Big hug as you get through tomorrow evening! Plan for it!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Planned and done! In my pj’s at 8 pm after a yoga class and taco salad. Going to bed sober tonight! Than you for your support and encouragement, it means the world to me right now!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I Quit Wineing says:

    Almost twelve months ago I started what was to have been about my 20th attempt at sobriety. I fell off the wagon after just three months. I could have kicked myself because during that time I actually went through one of the toughest trials which was my daughter’s wedding! I got through that but then went back to drinking a few weeks later. Thinking about it today I am grateful for all my previous failures. Without them I wouldn’t be where I am today. You see they are like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Every one is important. Insignificant on its own but when placed with all the other pieces it tells a story. Every failure was a lesson learned. Every new attempt meant I had more knowledge than the previous attempt. Those failures made me stronger. Today at almost six months sober I am thankful for my past. You will be too. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Cheering you on.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. I love your perspective and the importance of every piece of the puzzle. I feel like I am getting stronger and more resolute in my decision to not drink. It sort of feels empowering and freeing in a sense. Love your support and thank you so much!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s great that you’ve seen through the cunning alcohol illusions, realising that it has nothing left to offer you is a good thing. I know that the beginning is hard, please hang in there and keep going, it gets better and easier. Keep sharing, there’s plenty of support here. Hugs x

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much. It is hard but it doesn’t have anything good left so that gives me strength and hope and I love the support here. I feel like it’s a safe place even though it’s the internet and probably will be accessible to anyone, but sobriety is worth it to me now!!! Hugs 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Stay strong love ❤

    Like

    1. Thank you! I am trying 🙂

      Like

  5. ainsobriety says:

    Day one is a great place to be. You do have much support here.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love hearing from you…you are SUCH an inspiration and a true testament that it does get better and hard things can be done!!! You’ve been through a lot and you’ve done it sober! I love that and thank you for being here 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Hey Christy! I hope that your day today is going well! Day 2 and 3 were always so tough for me to make it through, MAN did I come up with excuses to drink again! Hope you’re hanging in there ❤

    Like

    1. Thank you! Yes, day 2 and 3 are hard for me too but once I get past those (like I’ve done it so MANY times…NOT) it was easier. I am so tired and ready to live again. I’m hanging in there and still sober tonight! Thank you for your encouragement, it means the world to me! Hugs…Christy

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yay you for still being sober tonight!! So proud of you! So tomorrow will be day 3?

        Like

  7. Hi Christy,
    Never give up. That was my motto when I had a slip.
    I am very happy you are trying again.
    xo
    Wendy

    Like

  8. Hi Christy, You haven’t lost the war if you keep trying! It’s a great thing to see that alcohol stops working after a while. The impetus to changes usually comes when you find out that it takes more that it gives. Toward the end it gave nothing to me except misery and temporary relief from a shaky disgusting hangover. You can do this!!!!!! Get support go to meetings keep blogging do whatever it takes. Being sober is bloody amazing. It’s not always easy but it’s so worth it. YOU are worth it. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for the encouragement!!! I am hoping I am where you were…It’s all misery and regret nowadays. I’m on day 3 today and it’s almost over. I’m going to keep going this time 🙂 . Hugs.

      Liked by 1 person

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